And I Am Thankful

Gabby Barrett- The Good Ones


He’s a phone call to his parents
He’s a Bible by the bed
He’s the t-shirt that I’m wearing
He’s the song stuck in my Head
He’s solid and He’s steady
Like the Allegheny runs
He knows just where He’s going
And He’s proud of where He’s from

One of the good ones
He’s one of the good ones

A love me like he should one
Like he wrote the book one
The kind you find when you don’t even look one
Anybody can be good once
But He’s good all the time
He’s one of the good ones
And He’s all mine
He’s one of the good ones

You’ll know Him when you see Him
By the way He looks at me
You’d say He hung the moon
I’d say He hung the galaxy
Nobody does it better
Oh the way He pulls me in
I’ve known a couple bad ones
But they all led me to Him

He’s one of the good ones

A love me like he should one
Like he wrote the book one
The kind you find when you don’t even look one
Anybody can be good once
But He’s good all the time
He’s one of the good ones
And He’s all mine
He’s one of the good ones

We should all find us one
They’re out there, minus one
Some of the good ones
Yeah, I got a good one

A love me like he should one
Like he wrote the book one
The kind you find when you don’t even look
Anybody can be good once
But He’s good all the time
He’s one of the good ones
And He’s all mine
He’s one of the good ones
And He’s all mine

I heard this song for the first time today and the timing could not be more perfect.

I truly have one of the good ones. And I am thankful.

There are many decisions that led to where my life is right now. One of those reasons was an answer to a heavy question presented to me a few years ago, at some point in 2018: “If your marriage was your daughter’s marriage, would you hope she would stay? Would you tell her it was good for her?” That question sat on my chest for a long time. Would I want my daughter to live unloved and mistreated, would I be able to tell her to stay in relationship with someone who wasn’t honest with her, would I tell her that her happiness didn’t matter and advise her to put aside her needs indefinitely? No. Not only no, but the idea broke my heart over and over as I wrestled with this question.  I felt as though I was being dishonest with her even living as though things were merely acceptable in my own marriage, let alone looking ahead at adult her and how she would or wouldn’t be treated by her future spouse, to having to explain to her the reasons for the sorrow she could see, the ways I hadn’t been real with her as she was growing up and becoming herself.

So much has taken place since that question was asked of me. Including the end of that marriage and the building of a new one. And I am so thankful.

Fast forward to last night. September, 2020.
I’m in my daughters’ room in this beautiful house I love, in this little town that feels like home in every way. My kids are settling in for the night and we have connected and laughed and provided emotionally and mentally and physically for them all day. There are no gaps to needs being met in this day for any of the souls I live with. I’ve stressed over choices and miscommunications and needs about school and therapies and co-parenting, but the day is almost done. I have done all I can do in all areas today.

I’m laying with my little firecracker and whisper-talking to my 11 (going on 16) year old about life; ballet, math, fall plans, and clothes while we wait for baby sister to fall asleep. My dear husband comes in and tells me what he’s just finished to take some stress off me- without me asking- and about a talk he had with one of my sons. I suppose the relief on my face is visible to my daughter who can usually read me well anyway. I thank him and he goes to let us finish our girly talk.

My daughter turns to me and says “Your Timmy is so good to you.” I say “He really is, isn’t he?” And she says “When I grow up, I hope I marry someone just like Tim.”
And my heart felt a freedom I didn’t know I was needing.


It took one year.
One year of her watching a relationship up close that is worth learning from. I am daily being in loved in a way she can now say she wants in her own life. She is being taught respect and safety and honesty and real love every day. And I said to my husband last night when I thanked him for this that I could not believe it only took one year. How he found me when he did, I will be forever thankful. For how he rescued my heart and changed my story still surprises and delights me. How he has rewritten my life in this short time, changed even my children’s futures and their expectations for marriage and love and how-to-be-a-human in just one year…and I think what five more will do, and 10 and I could cry in gratitude and joy.

My Family

Our whirlwind romance wasn’t an accident or a reaction, it was a connecting of two parts of one whole, it was finding what had always been missing, it was divine. And one day, when my daughter asks me what marriage is, I get to tell her I was loved, like my Momo was loved by her beloved John, that what she saw everyday in her home was real and true and deep and right. I will get to say I showed her how a marriage is meant to be. These kids are watching and learning every day. They are seeing and learning honesty and integrity and love in this home. And I am so thankful.

For my life
For my children
For my Timmy
For my home
For truth
Thankful.

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