Megan, you are loved

It’s been three years today. Three years since the machines were turned off and Megan’s time on earth was ended. People in general still aren’t clear on what happened to her, they still hear slightly off information and they ask from time to time. ‘I’m sorry to ask you this but what did happen.’ (It’s…

Me, too.

The first time, I was groped and molested by a peer one year older than me while WEARING OVERALLS and long sleeves. I was sitting beside him, in a place with many others around us, a place I loved to be. He put his hand inside my overalls, then my shirt, into my bra and…

Digging into the Past, Emotional Abuse: Part Three

Originally posted on Long Days. Short Years.:
If I wasn’t naming this in a series, I would call this one something clever about dirty laundry. When my mother first cut me off, she uninvited me to Christmas events and did the regular silent treatment as emotional punishment thing. We even invited her to our home…

Sharing Your Story

Sharing our stories is scary. Allowing someone into your mind, your feelings, knowing others look to condemn those, is frightening. People in the story don’t like when we release the truth. They’ll say we are gossips, we are playing the victim, we are villains, we are immature, we like drama, we need attention. But sharing…

When Someone Dies and People Tell You How to Grieve

The last few years have been overwhelmed with losses. Personally I have seen the death of two grandparents, a godparent  and a life-long friend. Several friends have also experienced a multitude of losses in their families and circles. It seems to have come in multiples just now, in a way we haven’t expected, in a…

how can you not care?

I’m afraid it’s not even that we are forgetting what came before us. I’m afraid it is that we do not even care. Will my generation wake up in time? Will they learn history and truth and the ways both have tossed this people all here and to? I’m afraid they’ll never even care. Before…

Foster Parenting AGAIN!

Zachary’s painting hangs in the hall with my other kids’ artwork. He has a baby box and photo albums and ornaments on my Christmas tree. Zachary lived with us for 13 months and 2 days. He came to us as a 2 year old underdeveloped, abused, neglected, terrified child. He had sorrow in his eyes…

Re|learn Truth

It’s funny because sometimes you relearn a lesson you thought you knew, and you’re sure you’ve been trying to teach it to everyone else only to learn it was you that wasn’t getting it.  This season of life has been so bittersweet: losses and gains have swirled together in such a strange way it’s hard…

And That’s Enough

I can’t wait for them to go to bed. It’s around 7 PM and I’m thinking- I just have one more hour until it’s quiet.  And then it’s 8:30 and it’s quiet and I’m wishing they were still awake. Only calm and adult-like, or maybe actually adults. I’m lonely. I’m alone now, with the dog beside me…